wave bye to christmas

So Christmas has come and gone. I think that I blinked.

Anyway, Christmas eve was good and music filled, and I once again (only second time for me) went to the Hearne's house to help cook/serve dinner for some boys (19 this year) at Youth Alternatives. After appetizers and dinner (which still amazes me how they get so excited about the first food that they seem to forget that even better and more food ... i.e. dinner ... is coming shortly, so patience child, patience), they gather around the tree to open presents, graciously given just for them. They, like typical children, absolutely light up with excitement at the opportunity to receive the gifts, even when they are still unopened. It is good to remember (and be reminded of) these simple things - the unbridled response to grace.

So after that, and hanging around with the family as a partially adopted person, I decided to drive up to Austin at about 2am this morning. The traffic at the three o'clock hour is beautiful in its absence. I arrived in front of my sister's apartment gate just after 3:30am, only to realize that I had no way into the complex ... that is, of course, without waking up my sister to buzz me in the gate (I know, Kelli, that you are thankful for that). An hour later, a car finally came and I followed it in. Yea to strangers with access!

I suppose that concludes Christmas. I did not receive my only Christmas wish: that I might be able to feel Christmas, to experience the joy and that excitement of anticipation. My intellectual understanding is not sustaining; I simply desire to feel - to feel the gratitude of Christ coming and to be filled with praise of God's decision to dwell among us. I miss that. Maybe next year, Santa will bring it.