frosting, icee, IV fluid, oh my

I decided to lift my head out of the sand for a moment and check in. I have just opened up a new can of my infamous pink frosting (Duncan Hines strawberries 'n cream to be precise) - my "it's going to be such a really late night that I get to see the coming of morning" comfort food product, and my new favorite addition: an icee. Now, I have not had an icee for at least a decade - that is until Chicago, when one evening I was walking around south downtown and for some reason, walked into a convenience store. And it was good. The next one that I had was a couple of weeks ago at the international film festival ... two, in fact (one before the film and one after). I guess it is pretty bad when you come to the point of having to bribe your body (and force feed it through a tube after passing out) to stay awake and functioning. Which brings me back to the beginning.

About ten days ago, my life will change. I understand the squirms that some with any English grammatical experience may have with my change in tenses, but my words are carefully chosen. That weekend, while visiting my sister in Austin for a short weekend away, we fleshed out, among other things, my future as it stood and now stands. Evaluating and giving consideration to the desired influence, gain, value, and effectiveness, I decided to change. I must say that I do not truly understand why people are so frightened of change. Change is no big deal, especially when I know where I am going next. I am fine with being called out of somewhere / something as long as there is a to somewhere. It is more stressful when God does not play by these rules of mine and does not tell me the "to" part. But really, I can trust that there will always be a "to". But this is yet another tangent.

So I still plan to study architecture in Berlin from January until May of 2008. Instead of staying another two months and working at an architecture firm in Berlin, I decided to, and am extremely excited about, applying for an internship with Engineering Ministries International in their Uganda office (or their India office). Since last year when I was introduced to this organization, I have desired to work with them full-time after I am licensed. Their main slogan is "designing a world of hope". That would be an amazing opportunity to be used in such a powerful and effective ministry. But, as a plan B, I was asked if I would consider being a house-leader for Habitat for Humanity in San Antonio. The wonderful part of this scheme is one: I enjoy doing this type of work; this is what I do in my free time; and two: I would get paid a small amount as opposed to paying (which I am becoming slightly more anxious each time I think about how I am going to come up with the money to do these plans; this is where my faith gets tested). And then graduate school comes starting next fall, and unless a miracle happens (which I will welcome), in-state tuition is looking more and more friendly. Three to four semesters of grad school (depending if the school accepts my Berlin studio as one of their four required design studios), I graduate with a Master's of Architecture, a professional degree, I sit for my nine licensing exams starting six months after graduation (you are not allowed to start sooner), become licensed, and then help/design/serve ... the rest of my life. Does this phrase disconcert anyone else? ...